In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
Me too!
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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