butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I'm really into asian looking animals
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
