some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Im just a social blackout drinker.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
