What did we do last night that was yellow?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
