it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Randomize