Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
