this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
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oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
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Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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