I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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