Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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