there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
