Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
