bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
