He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
