I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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