My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
my shit smells like andre
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
