i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
She's the barista slut.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
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