I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i just wanna soil my oats bro
I think im going to throw up on grandma
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
