Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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