You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
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