from now on my penis is your penis
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
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frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I wear drunk well.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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