I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
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My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
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i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
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