The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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