Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize