She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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