been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
