my being single is dangerous.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Mom said you looked used
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize
