Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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