I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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