OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
...so i touched it.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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