he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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