After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
