I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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