I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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