So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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