Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
