what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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