New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
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