Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
