toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Me too!
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
