We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
sarcasm needs its own font
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
