she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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