i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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