You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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