woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
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