The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I just found puke in my bra..
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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