Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
