Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
