Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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