The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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