i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
